Divorce Wizards

High Conflict Divorce Mediation

Surviving Divorce: The Process of Divorce

Maxine B. Cohen, M.F.T.

I was having dinner with a friend at The Chart House. The restaurant was surprisingly empty so we were able to get a table right by the water.

I was enjoying the view and my entree had just arrived when the quiet was broken by a loud crashing sound. I whirled around to see a chair overturned and a man on his feet, eyes bulging, body in red alert. "Whaddaya mean why can't we go on with this marriage," he hissed. "We can't even have dinner together without fighting!" Out he walked, leaving his wife alone at the table. I held my breath, waiting for what was going to happen next. Then I heard it. Sharp intake of breath. Soft sounds of sobbing, and trying not to.

My heart goes out to this man and this woman. They are both in tremendous pain, regardless of who is ostensibly leaving whom. Divorce is one of the most stressful events that can occur in a lifetime, ranking right up there with the death of a spouse.

A significant portion of my private practice is devoted to working with people who are going through divorce. From my professional training and my own personal experience, I understand the process of transition and I know how to best help people cope with all the scary changes.

There are two major phases to be negotiated. The first is working through the often overwhelming feelings of grief. The second is putting a new life together in a way that fits and supports the person you are becoming.

Let's talk first about the grieving process.

Maxine Cohen
949-644-6435 |
Maxine Cohen is a licensed marriage and family therapist who has worked with individuals, couples, and families since 1989. She is an expert on all aspects of the divorce transition-from how to tell the children in the best possible way, to riding the emotional roller coaster and grieving the loss, to dating and rebuilding a life that is satisfying and good. Maxine is also a writer, having contributed columns to Orange Coast Magazine and the local editions of the Orange County Register and the LA Times (Daily Pilot) for the past 10 years. She is in private practice in Newport Beach.

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